.png)
When we think grief, most of us will attach this to the loss of a loved one. From 2000-2006, I lost my dad, my 40 year old sister, my 18-year old niece and my mom, in that order. I felt the wind kicked out of me with each passing. I sobbed (still do on occasion), mourned, went through the identified stages of grief, my own stages of grief and lived through that distinctive pain. It's the kind of pain you know when you've had direct experience otherwise there isn't language to accurately convey this kind of hurt and confusion. I continue to honor my grief as I will forever miss each of them dearly. As the saying goes, hindsight is 20/20 and how differently my grieving would have been, and the earlier I would have started. Long-term, serious illness was the cause of the deaths of my dad, mom and niece. My dad had multiple strokes, the last of which left him bed-ridden, non-verbal and on a feeding tube, with my mother opting to be his full-time caregiver for the three years up until his death. My mom's diagnosis of stage 4 colon cancer that had metastasized came seven months after my dad's death and was a six year battle. My niece's diagnosis of osteosarcoma, bone cancer, in her left knee came shortly after my mom's diagnosis and was a five year battle. Each of these devastating situations would have been opportunities to grieve while they were still alive, nurturing my hurting heart, tempering my fears and minding the exhaustion. The reality was motoring through, pushing limits to navigate the draining uncertainty that comes with serious illness and living with the tension and unawareness of how much inner help I needed. My full, hurting heart going all-in, non-stop until the blow of each death shattered my heart every time.
​
My sister's death was sudden. She passed in her sleep of what the autopsy showed was a grand mal seizure. She was epileptic so this determination was clinically acceptable. She was going through a divorce, one she did not want, from her high school sweetheart, the love of her life. On the morning of the day she was to sign the final divorce papers, the ones she had been dreading and avoiding to sign, she never woke up. The hysterics of that morning and the months of accepting she was gone, honestly I can't remember how long it actually took to settle in that she died. At the time, I was not equipped to process her sudden death especially when this was at the height of cancer treatments for both my mom and my niece and it was three years after my dad's death after a long illness. My brand of resilience then was to push through and endure at any cost.
​
I type this acknowledging how far I've come since these nightmares and how differently I would navigate today. Starting with extending love, understanding, grace, compassion and sensitivity to myself. How much more of these feelings I could have extended to each of them. I was scared, exhausted, pushing through trying to work, take care of myself and survive the everyday with an incredibly sad heart. Also, fiendishly researching anything the internet, which was a fairly newer resource, trying to find hope. So much was happening but grieving was not one.
​
Today, I have honed and continue to do so my personal brand of grieving, because grief is not exclusive to death! It's weaved into most of the sudden, unplanned changes of our lives and it's important we give our grief the recognition and appreciation it deserves. I have applied this to divorce, illness, heartbreak and any abrupt, unintended changes including in my career.
​
I am honored you are here and I have the opportunity to work with you! When we connect, I'll learn the source of your grief, your current reality and what you desire for your future. The future can be that same day, tomorrow and every day thereafter or a specific set of timeframes. Whatever your timeline, we will identify and clarify where you are and where you intend to go. Dare to Be Me Coaching is a results-driven approach, therefore typical outcomes experienced at your first session are seeing your eyes brighten, your breath lighten and your shoulders loosen. Message me to connect or feel free to schedule your 30-min free session.
Grief Coaching
How we grieve is highly personalized. We can read about stages, talk with professionals, family and friends and learn the spectrum of ways grief is experienced. There is no shortage of well-intended advice that comes our way. When all of this is too much or not enough and the ick persists, grief coaching can be an extremely insightful and supportive path to uplift and growth. Where can grief reside?
-
Death of a loved one
-
Divorce
-
Heartbreak
-
Job loss
-
Familial estrangement
-
Anywhere you feel attached to and sorrowful
​The inspiration for this list of life experiences is personal, because it's mine. Confidently, I can state how we cope and persevere is an individual's journey. My purpose is to champion those navigating grief in healthier and faster ways to a path beyond surviving to thriving, living from a brighter place than you feel or thought possible. Your personal brand of resilience is your super power that is the foundation to managing your current reality. What is at the core of revealing and tapping into this super power? Daring to Be YOU!
​
Click below to schedule your free 30 minute session to talk about your current source(s) of grief. Together, we will determine if Dare to Be Me Coaching is the compassionate partner to help you discover your personal brand of resilience and get you to the other side. Not ready? Read on further to learn more about my personal journey.
​
